The Beat-Up Bus: Grief, Anger, and the Blame Game

Job 3, Ephesians 4:26-32

Think of a time during the past week when you felt your emotions changing in the direction of anger. Which of the following statements characterized your response?

a. I ignored it.
b. I overreacted to it.
c. I worked to address it.

What was the result? What did you reap?

Anger shows itself in a variety of forms. Which form are you most likely to struggle with?

a. Irritability or bitterness?
b. Yelling or screaming?
c. Explosions?
d. Acts of fury to defend yourself (or others)?
e. Acts of self-injury (cutting yourself, misusing food, sex, alcohol, drugs, exercise, etc.)?
f. Dwelling on dark things that others have done?
g. Revenge, destroying others
h. Stewing and brewing

Anger is a heart issue. Understand how your heart leads to anger: A desire for even a good thing becomes a bad thing when that desire becomes a ruling thing.

"I want _______." (Desire)
"I must have _______." (Demand)
"I will have _______." (Need)
"You should _______." (Expectation)
"You didn't _______." (Disappointment)
Therefore, "I will _______." (Punishment)

What is your typical mode of punishment when you do not get your way?
(Silence, withdrawal, angry words, violence?)

Where do you tend to get irritated, frustrated, discouraged, or experience flashes of anger? Do you recognize any themes or patterns?

We can't control everything that happens to or around us. But, what can you control?
(Changes inside of yourself.)

Why does my heart towards others have to do with my heart towards God?
(1 John 4:19-21)

What is God revealing to you that he wants you to own, because He loves you and wants to change you, so that you can experience the freedom and joy of His rule in your heart? Be specific and ask those in your rGroup to pray for you and hold you accountable. Change is a community project.

So, you have an anger issue. What do you do?
(Anger must be surrendered. The only way out is to surrender your anger to God. Do not control or mange it in your flesh. Let the Spirit move you to action or bring you to brokenness.)

Are you ready to humble yourself in your broken state and surrender your sinful anger to God? Know that He will give you grace in your time of need.
(James 4:6)

Outbursts of anger can feel good for a moment (to our flesh), but how does it feel to surrender your anger to God? (Frees our spirit, removes weight of sin, mends relationship with God and others, allows you to focus on what's Holy, enables you to move forward, etc.)